Wednesday, May 4, 2011

We're so (dare I say it) NORMAL!

After more than a year of "not-normal", I am happy to report that we are approaching a very wonderful place of "normal", or as normal as anyone could be with twin 1 year olds and a 4 year old.  I'm loving all of the "normal" things we have been doing lately.  After a year of isolation, it feels so liberating to be able to go out of the house with the babies.  Here are all of the normal things that others may take for granted but which are so exciting to us:

- going to the park
- going to restaurants (and even sitting inside)
- meeting the family
- Easter egg hunting (or posing the babies with eggs anyway)
- going to Target or the mall or anywhere
- meeting other moms for playdates or lunch

Of course, we still have some "not-so-normal", but I think we are approaching more "normal" and less "not-so-normal", and we couldn't be more thrilled about it.  Here's a little of our "not-so-normal":

- still have to swaddle Camdyn to get her to take a bottle.  I know it sounds ridiculous, but it's what we have to do.
- go to weekly therapy appointments, but I don't mind them at all because I know they are helping.
- count every calorie that the babies consume to a point of obsession
- stress over their weight gain non-stop
- worry about reaching milestones, etc.

Here's my biggest "not-so-normal" act.  It happens every night.  When I lay the babies down to sleep, I cry every night.  I say a prayer that goes something like this, "God, I don't know why you chose to let me keep these babies, why you decided they should live, but thank you for these two precious souls that you have given me."  Then I kiss each of them again and again.  Then I go into Brenna's room and smother her with kisses and hugs too.  Every night, I do this.  Do other parents do this?  Is it going to get better because I don't think they are going to like it very much when they are 13 and Brenna is 16 if I am still doing this?  I'm really going to have to learn how to control myself.  I feel so incredibly blessed, and as difficult as this past year of completely "not normal" has been, it sure makes every little "normal" thing so unbelievably amazing!



We all went out to eat for my mom's birthday.  Happy Birthday Mom!


My kids with their great-grandparents (my grandparents).
   

4 comments:

Megan said...

Hey - not sure I have your correct email address. Can you send a message to me at megan.crain@gmail.com?

I'd LOVE it if you have any feeding supplies you'd be willing to send my way- specifically any farrell bags?? If you email me, I'll send you my address that way.

Hope all is well with your cute crew! :)

Stacey B. said...

Great pictures...and I think your nighttime "mush fest" is just fine...I find myself praying all day throughout the day and whenever I'm awake at night over our baby girl...it's constant...I can't help myself. =) I'm sure she's had just about enough of me slopping all over her.... Ha!

Bridget Brandt said...

That just makes you a MOM! All of the good ones do that.

Happy Mother's Day!

Michelle said...

Stacey & Sis-

I'm glad you two are "mushes" too. That makes me feel more normal!