Tonight was like any ordinary night at our house. I put some chicken tortilla soup in the crock pot earlier today. I ran errands. Daddy got home from work. We both played with the kids. He wrestled with Cade on the living room floor. He tossed Camdyn high into the air at her requests of "high - more, more - high" as she giggled with delight. We all sat on the couch - Brenna and Daddy watching cartoons, me and Camdyn and Cade reading books. Daddy and I put the twins into their high chairs, filled their plates with chicken from the soup, and handed them spoons. We prayed and heard that adorable echo from Camdyn and Cade as we said "amen". We gathered around the table and all ate dinner. At the sound of "all done" with hands shaking in the air to sign "all done", we cleaned the kids up, gave goodnight kisses, and laid them down in their beds. Why do I write all of these mundane details? I write them to remember how thankful we are to have these ordinary moments.
I have battled with being able to recall our NICU times at my own will rather than traumatic memories flooding my thoughts at their own will. Tonight and tomorrow I will look back because I want to. I want to remember where we have been and how far we have come. I want to recognize the gifts we've been given. I want to give thanks for every ordinary moment.
Two years ago on this night, Dr. Breed who we credit for saving Cade's life many times, proudly holds Camdyn and Cade on their last night at the hospital.
Daddy talking to Camdyn and Cade just before their crib was wheeled out of the NICU down the hallway into our rooming-in room. I love the "going home" signs in this picture. The monitor is off. For 133 days, we stared at that monitor willing the saturation numbers to go up. The car seats are sitting there anxiously waiting to be filled with babies, picked up, and carried home!
Daddy laying down with Cade and Camdyn during one of the many feeds. Notice the feeding pump in the corner of the picture. This struck me as picture worthy when I realized that for 4 1/2 months we were not able to lay beside our babies. We were able to hold them in the reclining chair. This just looked so normal to me (minus the feeding pump) that I had to take a picture. We spent all night feeding the twins. A representative from the medical supply company came to train us on how to use the pump. She "demonstrated" with nothing actually in the pump and made it sound so easy. I think she probably never actually used one. We had to go ask the NICU nurses, but since they weren't familiar with this kind of pump, they didn't know either. We eventually figured it out, but it took us an hour to prep it and then clean it when the feed was over. With feeding every 3 hours and the feeds taking 2 hours with two very nervous parents, we did not sleep! None of that really mattered though because we were finally taking our babies home!
Cade and Camdyn ready to go home.
And now these two cutie pies are sleeping peacefully in their beds. They ate dinner (by mouth!) and will not need to eat again until breakfast! Mommy and Daddy get to sleep all night and the tubes are long gone. Wow! We have so much for which to be thankful. God is good - really, really good!
3 comments:
I'm so thankful tat you write such encouraging words! One of my twins just came home with a g-tube and feeding pump. It is very overwhelming until we get into a grove. I can't wait for light at the end of the tunnel!!
Laura- I'm glad you found some encouragement in this post. You might be interested in reading a post I wrote about g-tubes on preemiebabies101.com -
http://www.preemiebabies101.com/2012/06/a-g-tube-is-not-a-white-flag/#comments
Wishing you smooth sailing from here on out.
I love that the twins were both able to come home on the same day. What a blessing. Happy homecoming day! You both have come sooooo far!
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